MY ANALYSIS
You walk into oncoming traffic by accident, how do you get back safely!?
A. Wait patiently in the middle of the street until traffic stops, then walk to the other side of the road.
B. Pitch out an umbrella and pretend to be a professional Croquet player.
C. Start doing gymnastics, hoping to make people move out of your way.
D. Read a Harry Potter book and be whisked away into Hogwarts, where all your dreams come true!
The answer is:
B. March back and forth carrying a sign that says "Heck no, we won't go."
People will see the sign and immediately realize that heck, you're not going! They'll gladly stop and let you by.
JOKE O' THE DAY
What's the richest country in the world?
Definitely not the Atlantic Ocean!
MIKE AND BoB
(BoB is slouched on the couch, looking depressed)
Mike: What's wrong?
BoB: Eh..just a little down.
(Mike sits down on the couch)
Mike: Talk to me about it...just don't pull down the curtains and cover your face with them to show your misery like last time.
BoB: This girl at school said a really mean thing to me.
Mike: You haven't been to school in decades.
BoB: That's the thing, how did I get there?
Mike: Maybe you were dreaming?
BoB: Aaah yeah, a dream...I guess that explains the hair to my shoulders and clowns doing back flips in the hallway.
Mike: Yeah..wanna get a pizza?
BoB: I'll drive.
Mike: I have to call it in, we don't have a car.
BoB: We have a lawnmower.
Mike: I'll just call it i-
(a motor starts up, BoB is seen pushing a lawnmower down the road into the sunset)
DR. BILL'S HEALTH TIP:
Being a kamikaze pilot isn't a profession that I would encourage. There's lots of bugs up there and what if one was to lodge itself in your nostril? Don't come knockin on my door sister, cause these boots ain't gonna talk! Mailman, however, is a very honorable occupation and will do good for the people. There are certain dangers however such as tall grass, sharp newspaper corners, and the red flag on the mailbox! If injured take 7 shots of adrenaline and rest in an extremely cold environment such as a meat locker or a freezer.
Doctor's orders!
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